SoFi Blog

Having a child is one of the biggest decisions a couple can make. The second largest decision? Choosing which child care is right for their family. With all the options out there, settling on just one can be a challenge, as every family’s situation and needs are different.

On top of that, in my 10 years of helping new parents financially plan their families, child care also tends to be the second largest monthly expense, after housing. And contrary to what you might think, it’s not an expense that some parents can choose not to budget for. Even if you have one stay-at-home parent, you’ll still need to pay for some babysitting and child care, as it’s wan important part of maintaining a healthy relationship with a partner—not to mention provides a necessary mental break for both.

Starting a family, or even starting to think about it, is an incredible stage in life. But it can also be overwhelming. You might be thinking about the hard questions: What will your life be like with a newborn? What will you and your partner be like as parents? Should you move closer to family?

A wealthy real estate mogul recently told millennials to stop buying avocado toast if they ever want to buy a house, and the internet went berserk. The advice was poorly received, because many felt that it was out of touch with the current financial environment. For one, the millennial generation has only ever known income stagnation, wages that haven’t kept up with inflation, and skyrocketing college and real estate prices. Two, the assertion that we can’t stop shelling out for fancy breakfast foods buys into the shallow narrative that millennials don’t know the meaning of hard work or the value of a dollar.

While I largely side with the outraged denizens of the interwebs, I’ll play devil’s advocate here: Clearly, Avocado Man was hoping to make a point about frivolous spending, but he veers off track when making the assumption that this is a trademark of the millennial generation. Current times have seen people of all ages spend more on “stuff” than ever before.

Think about your best memories of your parents while you were growing up for a moment. Maybe it’s the year they finally bought that bike you wanted for your birthday, or all the times you opened the freezer to see it stocked with mint chocolate chip ice cream, because mom knew it was your favorite.

It’s worth pondering as you take in your parents now, as they grow older. You might be wondering when you’ll be returning the favor of taking care of them, and more importantly, how.