MONEY & LIFE

Relationship and Bank Breakups: What They Have in Common

July 14, 2022 · Reading Time: 4 minutes

Breakups can be tough. But what’s even tougher? Staying in relationships, whether with your partner or your bank, that aren’t right for you anymore. Millions kick the can down the road, but they’re missing out on the opportunity to find the right relationship or best bank for them.

SoFi recently partnered with Refinery29 to survey over a thousand Millennials for their thoughts on breakups, banking, and why people stay in relationships that no longer serve them, what problems they watch for in relationships, and how they discuss money with their partners. Overall, our survey found the two have more in common than one may think.

Staying Stuck

When it comes to relationships, people can get stuck for months or even years if it’s not right anymore. Almost half of Millennials reported staying in a romantic relationship for more than a year that was no longer right for them, and 37% have stayed with a bank for over a year that wasn’t right for them.

While that may sound like a long time, the survey found that 15% stayed in romantic relationships and 13% stayed in banking relationships for over 5 years even if it wasn’t right anymore.

But why? Many respondents said comfort and familiarity was a driving factor: 36% cited that for staying with the wrong bank for them and 42% for those in the wrong romantic relationship.

Red Flags

When it comes to red flags, they actually look pretty similar whether it’s your romantic relationship or your bank. More than half of respondents said that poor communication is one of their top three red flags for their bank and their relationship.

Other top red flags for you and your bank? A bad reputation and not taking your needs into consideration.

And what are people looking for in terms of good qualities? Trust ranked in the top three for romantic and banking relationships. When looking at women specifically, communication also ranked in the top priorities for both.

The Breakups

With people feeling stuck, how often do they actually break up? On average, Millennials have broken up with their partners 3 times, even “broken up” with a friend 3 times, but only broken up with their banks twice in their life so far.

When it comes to breaking up with their bank, less than half feel confident in knowing how to initiate the breakup.

Oil & Water and Money & Relationships

Money can be a tough topic to discuss, but even those in relationships can struggle even more on how to navigate their love lives and finances together. Over a third of respondents said they spoke to someone other than their romantic partner about their finances, such as a barista or hairdresser, and 45% actively avoided merging finances with a partner.
Half of Millennials would rather their partner read their text messages than their bank statements.

1 in 3 Millennials would rather tell someone they just met their problems in their bedroom vs. their problems with their finances.

1 in 3 Millennials would rather tell a first date the number of people they slept with then tell them their credit score.

Why the avoidance? Well, when it comes to merging finances, of those that avoided joining bank accounts, Millennials said it was because they didn’t trust their partner fully (53%) or they feared they’d break up eventually (48%).

The one conversation Millennials would like to have on the first date? Spending habits vs. bedroom habits. When it comes to knowing about the other person, women would rather know their first date’s worst spending habit than their weirdest bedroom fantasy, while men prefer the opposite.

What Does this Mean for Me?

All in all, people may be reluctant to break up or talk about their finances, but it’s never been more important for people to find what’s best for them, whether that means their bank or their romantic partner.

Are you looking to break up with your bank? Sign up here for SoFi Checking & Savings to experience what a better banking relationship is like.

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Source: Based on VICE and SoFi survey of 1,005 Millennials conducted in June 2022.

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