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One of my friends recently told me that she’s spent over $10,000 this year to attend seven weddings. This exorbitant figure made more sense once I realized they were nearly all destination weddings, but still — that’s a good start to a down payment on a house.

While she’s no doubt an outlier, it got me thinking about how expensive these celebrations can be. From tuxedos and gowns to registry gifts and hotel stays, the costs can add up fast.

Last year, wedding guests spent an an average of $610 per wedding, according to a study by The Knot, a wedding planning site. That’s an increase of $180 over the past five years. When travel was required, the bill was even higher: Those who drove from out of town spent an average of $840, while those who flew shelled out $1,680.

And then there’s being in the wedding party.. Between the various parties, matching outfits, Airbnbs, and boozy brunches, that’s a whole other layer of costs (Venmo much?). Zillow points out that the cost of attending one wedding + one bachelor(ette) weekend can cost nearly as much as the typical U.S. rent of $2,072. Yikes.

And get this: A Zillow survey found that nearly half of Gen Z and millennials had made some type of sacrifice on their housing so they could afford to go to wedding events. Common sacrifices included renting or buying a smaller place than they would have otherwise or living with roommates.

Luckily, I haven’t had to make trade-offs to be part of my friends’ big days, but I understand why people would, and I might if I had to. Attending a wedding is special, especially if you’re celebrating someone close to you. From crying happy tears when your friends walk down the aisle, to dressing up together and closing down the dance floor, it’s an experience that’s hard to give up. You just want to be there.

Unfortunately, it’s not always possible. One-quarter of Gen Z and millennials in Zillow’s survey said they’ve declined at least one wedding invitation because of the cost. And I do think it can be a good budget move to skip events that aren’t that important to you, especially if you’re getting a ton of invitations. If it’s a long-lost second cousin or a colleague that you barely know, it’s perfectly okay to RSVP “Not Attending.”

But if you really want to go and cost is the obstacle, don’t assume your bill is set in stone. For one, you don’t need to buy a new outfit and shoes for every wedding. It’s okay to be an outfit repeater: I wore the same dress to two back-to-back weddings, and I survived. Another option is to borrow an outfit from a friend. (You can return the favor when they have an event to attend.) You could also consider renting a dress or a tux, or altering something you find secondhand.

If it’s a destination wedding, you don’t have to stay at the resort suggested by the newlyweds. During a recent wedding, I ended up staying at a random-ish hotel because the suggested one was booked, and I saved about $1,000. And if you’re friends with other wedding guests, you could suggest splitting a room or an Airbnb. In the same vein, if the wedding requires a road trip, consider carpooling with others to split the gas costs (it might make the trip more fun, too).

And don’t forget credit card and loyalty points: If you have a travel credit card, the points can really add up, and I’ve often gotten free flights and big hotel discounts from mine. If you’re signed up for a free loyalty program with a big hotel chain or airline, that can help, too.

Lastly, plan ahead as much as possible. The nice thing about wedding invites is you get them enough in advance to be able to book flights and accommodations early — and hopefully snag better deals. You can also start saving in a dedicated fund as soon as you get the invite. Even if you put aside just $10 a week for a year, you’ll end up with $520 in your wedding fund. By the time the event rolls around, that cushion will make the expenses less stressful — and the experience more fun.

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